Have you ever considered you can stop a conversation without saying a word?
Whether you know it or not, you have probably done so on more than one occasion. In fact, we all have.
Your body language or facial expressions probably won’t be as obvious as it is in the image. In fact, to the outside observer it may even seem like you are still in a conversation. It might appear to the speaker that they are talking and you are listening. You might even think you are listening.
However, while you may be hearing the words as they are spoken, unless you are sincerely giving consideration to anything being said you are not actually listening.
It doesn’t matter whether you intended to stop the conversation or not.
And it doesn’t matter whether people are still speaking.
The conversation, for all practical purposes, is indeed over.
Why does this matter?
Because failing to be aware of how you might be stopping a conversation while it appears to continue can be very costly in terms of BOTH relationships AND progress. [click to continue...]
“Moore’s Law tells us technology is capable of doubling its capacity every few years. We, too, are increasing our capacity, especially the most achievement driven among us who tend to land in lives of leadership. We are working faster, more efficiently, longer and harder. All of which is reaching a boiling point evident in measures of workplace stress…”
–Ginny Whitelaw, PhD Biophysicist, former leader at NASA, Zen Master, Author of The Zen Leader
Many face this dilemma. It doesn’t seem to matter whether you are in an official position of leadership or not.
Yet is there a way to achieve success and satisfaction AND reduce the patterns of life and work that are escalating our stress levels?
The key might just be simpler than you think. In fact the way you think, in and of itself – your beliefs and mindset – is actually the key.
In my own journey of personal growth I continue to seek access to my beliefs and mindset that could be in the way of achieving the next level of success and satisfaction in my work and life. It is a never ending process of discovery. From the first few pages of The Zen Leader, 10 Ways to Go from Barely Managing to Leading Fearlessly I could tell this book would be my companion for some time to come. [click to continue...]
Is patience a desirable leadership trait?
Monica Diaz (@monedays) asked this question recently on Linked In. While my immediate response was absolutely, I think it’s important for us to be mindful of whether we are being patient for a higher purpose, or using the veneer of patience as a disguise for avoidance.
Here are a few examples I could come up with for when patience is an act of leadership and when it isn’t.
I would love for you to add to the list.
Patience IS an act of leadership when…
…you are patient wth people as they learn and go through the often difficult work of putting into practice what they are learning.
…you are patient enough to allow for people to stumble and even fail on occassion on their way to success, rather than expecting them to get everything right the first time.
…you are patient enough to allow there to be more questions than answers.
…you are patient enough to encourage people to challenge your thinking rather than expecting them to agree with your point of view because it seems to be faster and easier. [click to continue...]
Are you frustrated by people who show up late? Does it make you crazy when you show up on time, but others don’t, leaving you waiting?
Forget the incentives, the punishments and the gimmicks.
Lead by example instead.
There is a key principal you can use as your guide to taking action that will ensure people show up on time, as well as show up prepared and ready to engage for any meeting.
If you want people to honor your time, then make sure you honor theirs.
Here are three ways you can do that…
1. Always plan to arrive early AND start on time.
It is a great opportunity to lead by example. By planning to arrive early you are prepared for unexpected delays that could get in the way of your ability to start on time. Then honor the people who are there on time by starting as promised.
2. Design your meetings to produce a specific and meaningful outcome.
When planning your meeting start first by generating a meaningful outcome. Then ask yourself: would producing this outcome be worth the total investment of time required for preparation and participation from all involved? [click to continue...]
Is there someone who has believed in you even when you have gone through the dark days of self doubt?
Is there anyone in your life who listens for the best in you even when you are at your worst? They might even be tough on you, not out of judgement, but because they know who you really are and are calling for you to be and do your best at all times.
Do you have someone you call on your best days and feel free to unabashedly boast about your most recent accomplishment, big or small. You call them because you know they not only want to celebrate your wins with you, but feel joy when you do. And they know, perhaps better than anyone, what the accomplishment means to you in terms of what you had to do and who you had to be to make it happen.
If you have one person who provides any one of the above for you, you are very fortunate. While I am lucky to have a few champions in my corner, there is one person who stands out for me in this regard: Rich Largman, For over 15 years he has been a dear friend, a trusted colleague, and one of my favorite people with whom to collaborate. He is also my coach. [click to continue...]